Happy 4th Of July! (my 100th post!)

First of all, Happy Independence Day everyone! Please remember what this day is really about. And after you’re done remembering and out celebrating, eating, drinking and setting off fireworks, please be responsible and safe. Don’t let your good time come to a tragic end, or cause an innocent bystander any harm. So if you drink, don’t drive and stay put or use a designated driver and if you DO defy the laws (or live in the country) and set off fireworks, PLEASE PLEASE do it safely! Away from people (and pets!!), in a safely watered place with water very close by in case of an accident. No reason you can’t have fun safely!

So we celebrated the 4th last night at my house, because our town does the fireworks show on the 3rd. My first house party in roughly 10 years, and first one in my own house, as opposed to an apartment. It turned out so great! My little house looked great and I absolutely loved seeing my front yard filled with people I adore (mostly, my ex was there too lol). And 4 sweet little girls, barefoot and in swimsuits, ran screaming through the sprinklers and chasing bugs. It was an ideal summer night. Lots of crazy laughter and fun. And you can’t forget the delicious snacks!  I always imagined a picturesque night of a yard full of friends sitting around, while kids ran around in the backyard playing and squealing. I think its a reminder of my own childhood summer nights in the country and at the lake and I’m so happy that I’m able to give Pooh those same memories. Being a single parent you always wonder if you are giving your child the best you can, and making them happy. Even though Pooh passed out in her bed before everyone left, I’m certain she will tell me when I get home from work (she’s with gramma right now-yes I’m working on the 4th!) that she had fun sharing her home with her friends. It means so much to me to have a safe, happy, and lovely place that she and I both can be proud of and invite people to. This will sound incredibly cheesy, but as I was looking around the yard filled with about 15 adults, 4 little girls and one teen boy I couldn’t help but think my life was perfect. I don’t have tons of money, I still have stress and bills and frustrations at work, but overall, my heart is so full of happiness, all put there by these amazing people I’ve met in this small town that not many people have even heard of. Its like a magic town that grabbed me with both hands and pulled me in, making it home. Its filled with some of the best people I’ve ever met. I’m so lucky to be surrounded by such great people who make me laugh, support me, and just make me happy.  I still have things to change and goals to accomplish but they will be so much easier and more appreciated now that I feel at peace with my life and my choices. I have never been more grateful for what I have than I am now.

As a young girl my dreams were to be happily married with 3 kids and be the perfect hostess throwing great parties and always having a house full of people. And while I’m not married and its only one kid, looking around my yard last night listening to the hilariously inappropriate conversations and hearing laughter from my child and her friends running through the house and the banging of the screen door, I realized that maybe all my dreams haven’t come true yet, but some have. And I am so thankful that I was able to stop and appreciate that moment last night, because the good ones slip by so fast.  Over the past several years I’ve become very cynical, very angry, and just overall frustrated and unhappy with life-thinking I would never find a good man, have a great job, be happy etc. But over the last year as things have started to slowly fall into place I can honestly say I’m the happiest I’ve ever been in my life. I’ve done the impossible-made myself happy. I fully believe “In order to make someone else happy you have to make yourself happy first”.  And I’ve done it. So now all I want (not need) to add to my perfection is a sweet good man. I’m done letting my unhappiness push guys away and I’m ready for the right one to show up.  And I’m perfectly fine waiting til he is ready to arrive. Hopefully with cowboys boots and a big truck….

Have a wonderful holiday weekend! Take a moment to be thankful not only for what this day stands for, but for what YOU have. Don’t forget to appreciate those little things.

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